And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
