Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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