Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't