Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
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