You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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