Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
