I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Randomize
