Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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