I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
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