I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
