Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
How naked do you want me to be?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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