you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
