The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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