Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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