How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
a search helicopter?!
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
