How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize