weddingsv make me drug and hornr
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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