belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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