Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
