I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
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