I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
