is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
