I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
