so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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