I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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