he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
