Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone came in the potted fern
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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