Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Randomize
