That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
