Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
