if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize