Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
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