last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Randomize
