Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Every concussion has its silver lining
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I touched a dick in church today
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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