he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
