i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I'm just crazy horny about you
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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