Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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