Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
