So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
