oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
