its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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