Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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