I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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