What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
He felt like a one man threesome
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
