But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
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