erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
