whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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