You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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