also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize