Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
